Saturday, March 21, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Relationship
Hey friends,
I Recently updated my status on Facebook and got so many interesting views from my Facebook friends. I am copying below my status update and my friends responses to it. Now to add to it, something more interesting, my friend ( who still chooses to be anonymous), has borrowed my blog and is sharing her story with you all here.
My status update.
Kiran Sawhney My friend went on a first date with a guy and rejected him because, he made her pay. What do you think? Was she justified?
10:20pm · Comment · Like
Pranav Jain at 10:22pm March 18
Yup... totally..
Kiran Sawhney at 10:29pm March 18
girl is working. it was their first date. they did not split the bill. she paid the entire amount. she did not mind doing that but she dumped him for this. and it is a big discussion in our group. was she justified or not?
Priyanka Agarwal at 10:32pm March 18
depends on who called who out .....if d guy tuk her out he is suppose to pay n ifshe asked him out she is suppose to pay....
Bhawana Kapoor at 10:32pm March 18
Dutch nahi toh Ditch sahi ;-P
Viintii Vasundhra Aggarwal at 10:34pm March 18
Im with da GURL :-)
She made the right move . . .
Nidhi Prakash at 10:34pm March 18
i wud say 80%...
Raj K Pathak at 10:36pm March 18 via Facebook Mobile
totally justified....first date... guy shd hve offered to payy..wth her consent...she wd hve either thanked him else suggested to go dutch..ie split...i never heard ..woman made to pay...on first date:....DUMP SUCH GUY IS MY VERDICT....
Kiran Sawhney at 10:39pm March 18
Priyanka. In their case, no 1 asked no 1. They both mutually decided.
Nidhi- what do you mean by saying 80%?
Kiran Sawhney at 10:42pm March 18
Bhawana I like your slogan0 Dutch nahin to Ditch sahi.
Zinnia- her reason is- going on a date, she assess the guy- who pays? whether he opens the door, pulls a chair for her, how he treats the waiter etc. she says, she assessed the guy (usko tola) and rejected him.
Kamalika Bose at 10:42pm March 18
Cant comment on whether she's justified in dumping a first date for such reasons ... its a matter of personal choice, but gosh ... whats up with male chivalry? Is it a dead concept these days?
Michael J. Toro at 11:03pm March 18
Chivalry declined with the rise of feminism through which both sexes became equally self-absorbed.
Kiran Sawhney at 11:06pm March 18
self absorbed or High Maintenance?
Michael J. Toro at 11:06pm March 18
Let me add that I'm referring to modern feminism (1970s-).
Michael J. Toro at 11:12pm March 18
Perhaps both...similarly self-involved.
Vidisha Srivastava at 11:38pm March 18
i disagree...........whether the gal pay or the guy..it doesnt matter..she is a working girl......she can pay...this is a wrong criteria of dumping a guy.
Shalini Bahl at 12:18am March 19
maha kanjoos! DUMP!
Monica Jasuja at 12:27am March 19
justified, chivalry is NOT dead, not yet
Mish Mash at 1:33am March 19
Wow! What a discussion!
Tuppence from me here, may I?
Dump'n'RUN!!!!
Can you imagine what's going to happen next if a man is comfortable having a woman pay for him on a 1st date!?
Give him a finger he will take the whole arm.
No, never see him again.
I have dumped a guy myself (over the phone) on my way back home from the 1st date just for this reason.
Told him so too. Gave it to him straight. Feminism or chivalry aside it is just not practical to carry dead wood in the shape of a kept man - this is where this relationship was definitely heading. I believe going Dutch is the right thing, or later on you can treat him for his b'days or special occassions (and vice versa) but a first date should NEVER BE A FREE MEAL TICKET FOR NO-ONE (male or female). Full stop!
Parag Shah at 2:27am March 19
Think the guy was a cheap stake. You never make the women pay on a date...unless its a business transaction.
Kapil Mathur at 3:04am March 19
interesting discussion u hav started kiran ... so what kind of date was this, i mean how was it set-up? through the net or some mutual friends? what is ur gf's response of the overall experience besides the issue of bill payment? ... and how much was the bill for anyways? was it coffee in the evening or a lunch/dinner types?
Nanda Bal at 8:28am March 19
Absolutely justified!
Abid Hussain at 9:13am March 19
pyment shd nvr b reson...nt jstfd
Kiran Sawhney at 10:17am March 19
Mish Mash. I love your inputs. Very well said.
Kapil- It was set up mutually, as I have written earlier too. They both decided to go. It was an expensive restaurant they chose. Don't know about other details as in her other experience.
Abid- everyone else here seems to differ from your opinion.
Priya Pathiyan at 11:08am March 19 via Facebook Mobile
hmmm looks to me that the guy had already written her off. else he'd have offered to pay at least half. a guy wouldn't come on a first date with no money so he clearly is either a total loser or someone who thought he'd never be seein her again. both ways, she's better off dumping him, or she may get hurt in the long run. a guy who doesn't pay is a guy who's not really too into the girl.
Kiran Sawhney at 11:14am March 19
Well said Priya
Vikas Paul at 12:50pm March 19
Well Kiran, seems to be GD of IIMs.Nice Question.Well the Girl is not justified as any other boy would have offered to pay but just the monetary things are not all, may be he was short of money but he could be clean at heart.
Bala Ganesh at 1:34pm March 19
depends on the bill right? is that woman fat and eats like a pig?...i mean lobsters and wine are damn expensive man.i really don't thing the girl rejected this dude coz he dint pay... there could have been more reasons ..like.. he would have been boring as a UGC program, not a conversationalist, a poor listener, may be burped on her face after food and din't wear a deo , rides on a 70s lamba , farts and blames his date for that, and then would have been really small in his pants ...c'mon the guy should have scored on something other than paying for the food . or like Priya said, he wanted to just soak his head in a pond and let her off...may be she really sucks for a date.or it could have been the 30th of the month...
like Vikas said, shortage...recession...and shit happens
there are not just two but three sides for a coin...
Abid Hussain at 3:26pm March 19
yh cn udstd ppl difr frm my opnn...but actll stlmt/cndtn of date is still nt clr....well like the way hw ppl dscs this isue...bt still i agree wth priya's n vikas..opnn....but a intrstg issue.
Mubi Shaw at 4:34pm March 19
well she was justified.....not a gentleman.....
Here is my anonymous friend's version in her own words.
First of all, Thanks Kiran for letting me use your blog. I see that your friends have many different opinions. But everyone, just knows the half truth. So here I choose to tell the full story in the chronological order.
About 6 months back I got a random call from a guy, who claimed to have seen me somewhere and wanted to meet me. Of course, I took it as one of those crank/prank calls and hung up. He was persistent. I never spoke to him.
On 24th February, I again got a call from him. I don't know why I started chatting with him. He could not clearly and specifically answer where and when he had seen me. So of course, I was skeptical. We spoke over the phone and met at a public place.
He seemed to be a very busy person. I was giving this relationship just a try. But it was not heading anywhere. There were no romantic dates, long phone calls, nothing.
It was his Birthday on 6th March. I sent him flowers and gift and asked him to meet me. We met- just for a drive in the day time.
On 7th March he started telling me about his financial crisis and the some construction projects. He asked, if the need be, would I help him. I was taken aback but did not say much.
On 15th March, he asked for Rs. 3,50,000/-. I told him that I did not have that amount. He then asked for 1.5L. He was denied again.
I started discussing with my friends, including Kiran. We all had a unanimous opinion that he was a crook.
They asked me, if he had ever taken me out on a date. And the answer was no.We planned something.
I told him, to plan a date. We went out to an expensive restaurant and I had a lousy date. Firstly he never offered to pay the bill. So I did.
Now as per my and my friends plans, I asked him that since I did not have money, he was in need of, I had a pair of solitaires thats I could offer him. His answer was- where would I be able to sell those? I threw another bait by saying that my jeweler would buy it back. And he was- Yes OK. I love you for this.
And the next moment the guy was dumped. I told him that he was such a looser. End of the story. People beware of such swines.
I Recently updated my status on Facebook and got so many interesting views from my Facebook friends. I am copying below my status update and my friends responses to it. Now to add to it, something more interesting, my friend ( who still chooses to be anonymous), has borrowed my blog and is sharing her story with you all here.
My status update.
Kiran Sawhney My friend went on a first date with a guy and rejected him because, he made her pay. What do you think? Was she justified?
10:20pm · Comment · Like
Pranav Jain at 10:22pm March 18
Yup... totally..
Kiran Sawhney at 10:29pm March 18
girl is working. it was their first date. they did not split the bill. she paid the entire amount. she did not mind doing that but she dumped him for this. and it is a big discussion in our group. was she justified or not?
Priyanka Agarwal at 10:32pm March 18
depends on who called who out .....if d guy tuk her out he is suppose to pay n ifshe asked him out she is suppose to pay....
Bhawana Kapoor at 10:32pm March 18
Dutch nahi toh Ditch sahi ;-P
Viintii Vasundhra Aggarwal at 10:34pm March 18
Im with da GURL :-)
She made the right move . . .
Nidhi Prakash at 10:34pm March 18
i wud say 80%...
Raj K Pathak at 10:36pm March 18 via Facebook Mobile
totally justified....first date... guy shd hve offered to payy..wth her consent...she wd hve either thanked him else suggested to go dutch..ie split...i never heard ..woman made to pay...on first date:....DUMP SUCH GUY IS MY VERDICT....
Kiran Sawhney at 10:39pm March 18
Priyanka. In their case, no 1 asked no 1. They both mutually decided.
Nidhi- what do you mean by saying 80%?
Kiran Sawhney at 10:42pm March 18
Bhawana I like your slogan0 Dutch nahin to Ditch sahi.
Zinnia- her reason is- going on a date, she assess the guy- who pays? whether he opens the door, pulls a chair for her, how he treats the waiter etc. she says, she assessed the guy (usko tola) and rejected him.
Kamalika Bose at 10:42pm March 18
Cant comment on whether she's justified in dumping a first date for such reasons ... its a matter of personal choice, but gosh ... whats up with male chivalry? Is it a dead concept these days?
Michael J. Toro at 11:03pm March 18
Chivalry declined with the rise of feminism through which both sexes became equally self-absorbed.
Kiran Sawhney at 11:06pm March 18
self absorbed or High Maintenance?
Michael J. Toro at 11:06pm March 18
Let me add that I'm referring to modern feminism (1970s-).
Michael J. Toro at 11:12pm March 18
Perhaps both...similarly self-involved.
Vidisha Srivastava at 11:38pm March 18
i disagree...........whether the gal pay or the guy..it doesnt matter..she is a working girl......she can pay...this is a wrong criteria of dumping a guy.
Shalini Bahl at 12:18am March 19
maha kanjoos! DUMP!
Monica Jasuja at 12:27am March 19
justified, chivalry is NOT dead, not yet
Mish Mash at 1:33am March 19
Wow! What a discussion!
Tuppence from me here, may I?
Dump'n'RUN!!!!
Can you imagine what's going to happen next if a man is comfortable having a woman pay for him on a 1st date!?
Give him a finger he will take the whole arm.
No, never see him again.
I have dumped a guy myself (over the phone) on my way back home from the 1st date just for this reason.
Told him so too. Gave it to him straight. Feminism or chivalry aside it is just not practical to carry dead wood in the shape of a kept man - this is where this relationship was definitely heading. I believe going Dutch is the right thing, or later on you can treat him for his b'days or special occassions (and vice versa) but a first date should NEVER BE A FREE MEAL TICKET FOR NO-ONE (male or female). Full stop!
Parag Shah at 2:27am March 19
Think the guy was a cheap stake. You never make the women pay on a date...unless its a business transaction.
Kapil Mathur at 3:04am March 19
interesting discussion u hav started kiran ... so what kind of date was this, i mean how was it set-up? through the net or some mutual friends? what is ur gf's response of the overall experience besides the issue of bill payment? ... and how much was the bill for anyways? was it coffee in the evening or a lunch/dinner types?
Nanda Bal at 8:28am March 19
Absolutely justified!
Abid Hussain at 9:13am March 19
pyment shd nvr b reson...nt jstfd
Kiran Sawhney at 10:17am March 19
Mish Mash. I love your inputs. Very well said.
Kapil- It was set up mutually, as I have written earlier too. They both decided to go. It was an expensive restaurant they chose. Don't know about other details as in her other experience.
Abid- everyone else here seems to differ from your opinion.
Priya Pathiyan at 11:08am March 19 via Facebook Mobile
hmmm looks to me that the guy had already written her off. else he'd have offered to pay at least half. a guy wouldn't come on a first date with no money so he clearly is either a total loser or someone who thought he'd never be seein her again. both ways, she's better off dumping him, or she may get hurt in the long run. a guy who doesn't pay is a guy who's not really too into the girl.
Kiran Sawhney at 11:14am March 19
Well said Priya
Vikas Paul at 12:50pm March 19
Well Kiran, seems to be GD of IIMs.Nice Question.Well the Girl is not justified as any other boy would have offered to pay but just the monetary things are not all, may be he was short of money but he could be clean at heart.
Bala Ganesh at 1:34pm March 19
depends on the bill right? is that woman fat and eats like a pig?...i mean lobsters and wine are damn expensive man.i really don't thing the girl rejected this dude coz he dint pay... there could have been more reasons ..like.. he would have been boring as a UGC program, not a conversationalist, a poor listener, may be burped on her face after food and din't wear a deo , rides on a 70s lamba , farts and blames his date for that, and then would have been really small in his pants ...c'mon the guy should have scored on something other than paying for the food . or like Priya said, he wanted to just soak his head in a pond and let her off...may be she really sucks for a date.or it could have been the 30th of the month...
like Vikas said, shortage...recession...and shit happens
there are not just two but three sides for a coin...
Abid Hussain at 3:26pm March 19
yh cn udstd ppl difr frm my opnn...but actll stlmt/cndtn of date is still nt clr....well like the way hw ppl dscs this isue...bt still i agree wth priya's n vikas..opnn....but a intrstg issue.
Mubi Shaw at 4:34pm March 19
well she was justified.....not a gentleman.....
Here is my anonymous friend's version in her own words.
First of all, Thanks Kiran for letting me use your blog. I see that your friends have many different opinions. But everyone, just knows the half truth. So here I choose to tell the full story in the chronological order.
About 6 months back I got a random call from a guy, who claimed to have seen me somewhere and wanted to meet me. Of course, I took it as one of those crank/prank calls and hung up. He was persistent. I never spoke to him.
On 24th February, I again got a call from him. I don't know why I started chatting with him. He could not clearly and specifically answer where and when he had seen me. So of course, I was skeptical. We spoke over the phone and met at a public place.
He seemed to be a very busy person. I was giving this relationship just a try. But it was not heading anywhere. There were no romantic dates, long phone calls, nothing.
It was his Birthday on 6th March. I sent him flowers and gift and asked him to meet me. We met- just for a drive in the day time.
On 7th March he started telling me about his financial crisis and the some construction projects. He asked, if the need be, would I help him. I was taken aback but did not say much.
On 15th March, he asked for Rs. 3,50,000/-. I told him that I did not have that amount. He then asked for 1.5L. He was denied again.
I started discussing with my friends, including Kiran. We all had a unanimous opinion that he was a crook.
They asked me, if he had ever taken me out on a date. And the answer was no.We planned something.
I told him, to plan a date. We went out to an expensive restaurant and I had a lousy date. Firstly he never offered to pay the bill. So I did.
Now as per my and my friends plans, I asked him that since I did not have money, he was in need of, I had a pair of solitaires thats I could offer him. His answer was- where would I be able to sell those? I threw another bait by saying that my jeweler would buy it back. And he was- Yes OK. I love you for this.
And the next moment the guy was dumped. I told him that he was such a looser. End of the story. People beware of such swines.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)